morning pages 092418

I have both my pages that I’ve written by hand as well as it typed out.

 

page 1
I’m alive! Thank God this is the day the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it. Therefore I will not spend this day in anger, bitterness, resentment and self-pity. Now this is really where it starts it feels like drudgery, these morning pages always do and I’m tired of them already before I’ve begun but I just keep writing and drawing one word after another and for some reason Julia Cameron thinks this will help me have a better day. That strikes me laughable at this very moment but keep drawing words and I have nothing to say, nothing to say and that is ok because the main thing is I keep drawing words on the page no matter what and I know writing is supposed to free you so you can do and write yourself into any place and wonderment full of adventure and I hate my letter n’s. I should scan this as well as type this and that way you could

page 2
see my sloppy writing by my pen as well as being able to read it down below a above it however it comes out on the computer. I need a a new color of ink. I’m writing this with my Kaweco Perkeo Bad Taste fountain pen inked with Red Drank ink by Diamine. Now I’m using my Lamy Al Star turquoise with a EF nib inked with Serenity Blue by Waterman. I kind of like tis color but later on today I want to do a swab test with a q-tip with all of my blue inks and pick my favorite and go from there. This feels a bit on the violet side of things. I’m looking for a more truer blue but that will all come in due time I keep trying to paint but I can’t seem to bring anything together worth a crap but I will do what I have to and quit Quitting is so much easier than trying harder so if you have something a task that is to difficult to do then quit and move on

page 3
to something else you should quit the bad stuff in your life and seek out the good no matter how difficult things have become for you but press on instead I am so glad right now that this is my last third page of these morning pages and then I can move along and do something else that s stupid no mater what my dad thinks of me I don’t see to be doing much of anything and it doesn’t matter how many legs it has and how far you have to adjust to keep going which reminds me I need to look up Peter Pig miniatures. I want to get into miniature wargaming but I’m a bit put off by the price of the hobby and then there is the space and all the painting and terrain and fore=get it I’m already stressing out and I should do something else and no where am I constricted more so than in my own mind. I think its nonsense that we think we can do anything we want – we cant!

***

I’m glad I typed this all out, now I can see how my word count for each page and for the total as well.
Page 1 = 168 words
page 2 = 182 words
page 3 = 179 words

total = 529
average words/page = 176.33

so then if I type 530 words every morning in my word processor I would have my three pages of handwritten writing.

morning pages scanned p1 092418morning pages scanned p2 092418.jpegmorning pages scanned p3 092418

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