morning pages on monday october 1 2018

Thank God, I’m alive! This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it. Therefore I will not spend this day in anger, bitterness, resentment and self-pity. i will paint again and keep going and keep better tabs on my art expenses so i don’t get to crazy with all the paint and supplies but i like this because it helps me stay in focus and to get rid of all the other stuff and the other things that one could use while painting abstract art but it doesn’t matter all that matters is that i press on and keep a consistent body of work and i will do that if all i ever do is push the offset T format into the corner more and keep painting layers, thin layers of paint that all come together under the sun and isnt that troublesome? i personally dont think it is. I listened to a podcast with the famous art critic and reviewer Jerry Saltz. How freeing was that, maybe i will be an art critic of my own work which i need to do. i hope someday he will critic my art for better or for worse it wont matter as long as he gives me his heartfelt opinion on that i can see why it would be helpful to feel the love from Jerry. I digress, actually i dont i don’t have anything to say anymore and the fact that these are Julia Cameron’s morning pages, she says, that once you start you have to keep going. i have to hit 550 words until i do stop and i’m a little over half way which is hopeful because now were dropping like a roller coaster. the first half was the chain that pulled us up and now we are free falling down and i can see the first of many corkscrews and oooph i wish i wouldnt have eaten that corn dog before i got on this stupid thing im not 24 anymore. another 29 years makes a huge difference in how one perceives things at 65mph and pulling close to 2g’s im regretting my choices and we level out and finally we are going up getting slower and slower again which is very nice and smooth like how my face feels after a nice Proraso cream shaved with Harry’s blades and washed away. it feels like you really can start over and you wonder how long you have been going in circles again and in the back of my mind i can hardly wait to get to the art studio again and finish up some paintings and post them all over the place again and wonder why i didn’t hang in there when i did and i have to stop being so negative, that is just stupid on my part and i will overcome whatever funk i’m in right now and keep my focus where it needs to be and i will use less stuff and less things to paint and concentrate on the paint only no matter what. it boils down to the colors and where i place each volume of paint no matter how large and how small it may be carefully one dab at a time softly complicated easy.

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